Archive for the ‘prayer’ category

Funny in Church has Gone Big!

June 10, 2008

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The Bayer Adoption Garage Sale

March 29, 2008

I know, I know…this is supposed to be about church. Well in this particular case it is about church, but it happens away from the building, at a house.

In this case it is the home of our family friends, Zach & Holly Bayer. The reason this is about church is that a community of people have gathered around this couple, to help them adopt a child from Ethiopia.

People have generously given them televisions, couches, fine china, and a kitchen sink (literally), for a garage sale, to raise money. Apparently when you adopt you have to pay thousands of dollars in fees to get a baby. This is not to be confused with buying a baby, which can only be done on the black market. I imagine this requires speaking to people who either have curly mustaches or wear eye patches (but are not pirates).

This morning, Zach called me over to help him move a TV they just sold to a single woman, who did not have the means of teleporting the item to her home. I’ve moved furniture before, so I think this will be a piece of cake.

It was not. The TV wasn’t huge, but it was awkward to move because it can’t be removed from the wooden hutch it resides within. Add to that the brilliant idea from the manufacturer to put it on a swivel stand. And, if that isn’t enough, there are no wheels.

This unit which remember does not come apart, is chest high, and must be carried from the bottom as there is no where to grip it from the sides. Another defect I blame on the manufacturer.

In order to get this beastly object from point A to point B, we both had to overcome a serious obstacle for most men. Pride.

You see, with people watching us, we had to pick up the unit and get it as far as we could. Which on average was about three-and-a-half feet.

Internally, we are both thinking “I don’t want to put this thing down, that would be admitting defeat, but I think I just cut my hand open. Is that blood? I think I’m gonna pass out.”

Another time I thought “I can go another eight steps, no problem, oh no, my hand slipped and now I’m holding my end with one hand and my ear…PUT IT DOWN, PUT IT DOWN!”

We finally made it. All the way out of the garage and into the truck (about 15 feet). It took about a half hour.

We get to the ladies apartment complex and park. She tells us she is apartment one hundred something. Which is about a hundred yards from where we parked. We start praying for God to give us super human strength. He sent us a maintenance worker with a hand dolly.

The Lord works in mysterious ways.

Late Night Church Monsters

March 23, 2008

Churches can be a place of hope, and light, and warmth. Church can also be a terrifying place, especially at night. Occasionally, as the last staff person to leave, it would fall on me to go around and lock up. This required making sure that all of our heating, computers, and lights were turned off.

Once everything in our church was off, it went from dark to pitch black. For some reason the light switches were nowhere near the exit doors, so you would have to feel your way to safety. All the way along, hearing creaks and groans coming from floor boards, closets, and window panes.

I’m not ashamed to admit, that I am still a little bit afraid of the dark. Well, not so much the dark, but the idea of what can happen in the dark. You know, falling down stairs, running into sharp metal objects, being chased by monsters. The usual stuff.

If it’s possible, I think I may have prayed harder in church during those late evening lock-ups, than I did during morning services.